You make me new,
You are making me new.
About Me
- Brittany Nelson
- God is my best friend. Senior. Education major. There is no place like Nebraska. I love people, laughing, glitter and seeing the beauty in all things life has to offer. Adventures are worth taking. Every day is a new adventure. Prayer is powerful. ~Bring Your love to life inside of me Why don't You break my heart 'til it moves my hands and feet For the hopeless and the broken For the ones that don't know that You love them. Bring Your love to life inside of me.~
Friday, June 13, 2014
Saturday, May 24, 2014
The Horizon
On the Horizon of summer I feel adventure flowing through my veins and God living inside my heart. I do not know what the future of these next two months holds but I do know that my God is faithful and He will use me according to His purpose and plan. How exciting!!!
I am so excited. Tomorrow I will be starting my journey, meeting fresh faces, and standing up for loving Jesus. How beautiful and wonderful! In Ecclesiastes Solomon writes how there is a time for everything under the sun, this is my time. God brought me this far to help me to keep going. This is the summer He knew He wanted me at JAX. I do not have a reason why but I have learned you don't always need a reason.
Truly. The life I live is extraordinary. I am thankful and I trust you Lord with my heart and my life. Guide me this summer, allow me to be vulnerable, and help me to be encouraged and encourage others.
I love you Lord. Watch over me in JAX.
Love, Brittany
I am so excited. Tomorrow I will be starting my journey, meeting fresh faces, and standing up for loving Jesus. How beautiful and wonderful! In Ecclesiastes Solomon writes how there is a time for everything under the sun, this is my time. God brought me this far to help me to keep going. This is the summer He knew He wanted me at JAX. I do not have a reason why but I have learned you don't always need a reason.
Truly. The life I live is extraordinary. I am thankful and I trust you Lord with my heart and my life. Guide me this summer, allow me to be vulnerable, and help me to be encouraged and encourage others.
I love you Lord. Watch over me in JAX.
Love, Brittany
Saturday, May 17, 2014
Josh Wilson - Before The Morning
Josh Wilson - Before The Morning Lyrics
Do you wonder why you have to feel the things that hurt you?
If there's a God who loves you where is He now?
Or maybe there are things you can't see
And all those things are happening to bring a better ending
Someday, somehow you'll see, you'll see
Would you dare, would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing?
'Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming
So hold on, you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
'Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning
My friend, you know how this all ends
And you know where you're going
You just don't know how you'll get there so say a prayer
And hold on 'cause there's good for those who love God
But life is not a snapshot, it might take a little time
But you'll see the bigger picture
Would you dare, would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing?
'Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming
So hold on, you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
'Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning
Yeah, yeah, before the morning
Yeah, yeah
Once you feel the weight of glory
All your pain will fade to memory
Once you feel the weight of glory
All your pain will fade to memory, memory, memory, yeah
Would you dare, would you dare to believe
That you still got a reason to sing?
'Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming
Would you dare, would you dare to believe
That you still got a reason to sing?
'Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming
Come on, you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
'Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the hurt before the healing
Oh, the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning
Yeah, yeah, before the morning
Yeah, yeah, before the morning
Friday, May 16, 2014
The Signs
God, You keep giving me all these signs of Your presence and peace. It truly is unreal and it just makes me WANT to know You better. Tonight when mom shared with me that Grandma had been having dreams of her mother coming to pick her up a couple days before she died it just clarified the image I had received after hearing about Grandma's death and the way she went to Heaven after hearing that song.
I have told so many people that I just see this beautiful image of Grandma's mother out reaching her hand and taking her home. I never understood why I thought that but I did. God truly works in the most mysterious ways and the signs ARE there.
I still look in my baby book, just to verify the dates. They are always the same--February 23rd and November 5th. And every time I reflect on this significance I cry. There are 365 days in a year. What are the odds. It was not by random chance. God knew He had to get through to me somehow. I really do feel like God has a big purpose for my life.
I am finding such joy in sharing my story. Yes, it is still difficult but at the same time I have learned that crying is perfectly okay. I want to share. I want others to be encouraged by me.
The signs are there. I see them. I know God, You are real. Thank You for loving me, ALWAYS.
Tell Grandma, and everyone else hi!
Someday.
Love, Brittany
I have told so many people that I just see this beautiful image of Grandma's mother out reaching her hand and taking her home. I never understood why I thought that but I did. God truly works in the most mysterious ways and the signs ARE there.
I still look in my baby book, just to verify the dates. They are always the same--February 23rd and November 5th. And every time I reflect on this significance I cry. There are 365 days in a year. What are the odds. It was not by random chance. God knew He had to get through to me somehow. I really do feel like God has a big purpose for my life.
I am finding such joy in sharing my story. Yes, it is still difficult but at the same time I have learned that crying is perfectly okay. I want to share. I want others to be encouraged by me.
The signs are there. I see them. I know God, You are real. Thank You for loving me, ALWAYS.
Tell Grandma, and everyone else hi!
Someday.
Love, Brittany
Saturday, May 10, 2014
I remember.
When I feel alone,
I remember God is with me.
When I feel unloved,
I remember no one can ever love me more than God.
When I need a friend,
I remember God is always ready to listen.
When I don't understand,
I remember God doesn't always want us too.
When I see the bad,
I remember God is using it for my good.
When I wish my circumstances were different,
I remember God knows what He is doing.
When I wake up in the morning,
I remember to thank God for another day.
When I go to sleep,
I remember to pray.
When I am confused,
I remember to look to God for guidance.
When I am hurt,
I remember God will always fix my brokenness.
When I want to cry,
I remember that God comforts me.
When I laugh,
I remember to acknowledge the joy of life.
When life gets too busy,
I remember to spend time alone with God.
When I want to be in control of my life,
I remember that that's not possible without God's say.
When I feel defeated,
I remember God brings trials to bring triumphs.
When I want to give up,
I remember God never gives up.
When I don't know what to do,
I remember to pray.
I remember that God is in control of my life. He will provide, give me the desires of my heart, and use my life to glorify Him. I will trust Him always.
"And we know that ALL things work together for the GOOD of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28
Love,
Brittany
I remember God is with me.
When I feel unloved,
I remember no one can ever love me more than God.
When I need a friend,
I remember God is always ready to listen.
When I don't understand,
I remember God doesn't always want us too.
When I see the bad,
I remember God is using it for my good.
When I wish my circumstances were different,
I remember God knows what He is doing.
When I wake up in the morning,
I remember to thank God for another day.
When I go to sleep,
I remember to pray.
When I am confused,
I remember to look to God for guidance.
When I am hurt,
I remember God will always fix my brokenness.
When I want to cry,
I remember that God comforts me.
When I laugh,
I remember to acknowledge the joy of life.
When life gets too busy,
I remember to spend time alone with God.
When I want to be in control of my life,
I remember that that's not possible without God's say.
When I feel defeated,
I remember God brings trials to bring triumphs.
When I want to give up,
I remember God never gives up.
When I don't know what to do,
I remember to pray.
I remember that God is in control of my life. He will provide, give me the desires of my heart, and use my life to glorify Him. I will trust Him always.
"And we know that ALL things work together for the GOOD of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28
Love,
Brittany
Monday, May 5, 2014
Coffee Shop Dreams
As I write to you while sitting in Panera it is a slow realization that I am enjoying being completely by myself in this place, spending time with God and thinking. Two things that in the midst of my chaotic life I know that I don't spend enough time doing.
Just being.
Lately, I have felt my heart have such joy and zeal for life. Such hope in a future unknown. It is scary but it is exciting. I love all the new people I am meeting and can't wait to see how they influence me in the years to come.
As I sit here I am of course people watching. There are so many people in this weird world we live in and sometimes I just wish I could meet them all. Silly dream to have I know. But I do hope that I can find a way to leave a legacy on the few that I will get to encounter in my lifetime.
The verse that I want to focus on today is "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." Hebrews 13:8 ---While life is constantly changing around me, God, You stay consistent and the same. The stability that I need to get me through changing seasons.
Thank You.
Love,
Brittany
Just being.
Lately, I have felt my heart have such joy and zeal for life. Such hope in a future unknown. It is scary but it is exciting. I love all the new people I am meeting and can't wait to see how they influence me in the years to come.
As I sit here I am of course people watching. There are so many people in this weird world we live in and sometimes I just wish I could meet them all. Silly dream to have I know. But I do hope that I can find a way to leave a legacy on the few that I will get to encounter in my lifetime.
The verse that I want to focus on today is "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." Hebrews 13:8 ---While life is constantly changing around me, God, You stay consistent and the same. The stability that I need to get me through changing seasons.
Thank You.
Love,
Brittany
Thursday, May 1, 2014
Changing Seasons
I feel like I have been avoiding writing this entry. Not because I don't want too, or that it hasn't constantly been on my heart, but I think because sometimes it's surreal for me to face reality. Here I find myself again, changing seasons.
As doors close, friendships end, love is lost, and life is forcing change on me; I find myself almost sickly satisfied. I am a person who thrives on adventure but enjoys having stability. It's always been a love/hate relationship. I remember my last day of high school, naturally me being the emotional being I am, cried. I cried because it was over. It was like a perfect relationship that had to end for no reason. The life, person, and everything I had worked for the past 4 years I had to leave. What would be my identity? Well here I am again, only 4 years later and a lot more life experiences under my belt. Yet, I can't help but recognize the season changing.
I can not decide if I am happy or sad that this season is over for me. College has been full of good and bad. A lot of lessons learned and overall I am thankful for how God has shown me things throughout these years. I am thankful for the people He has blessed me with that He knew would be part of my story.
My story.
I suddenly just smiled. My story is still not finished. This is just a chapter and I think I feel sickly satisfied to be able to turn the page, this time with God's help. He definitely had to work for my heart but it is His!!! His love is the best. Yesterday I randomly opened my Bible like I love to do because God is always speaking to me.
"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, the I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
I JUST LOVE THIS. Seriously, it may be one of my life verses. When I reflect on everything my heart has been through to reach this point I just kinda laugh and say really God?! But I know it was the only way He would fully get my attention. I am still weak and everyday I get a little bit stronger. I still make mistakes and I know I am not perfect. But the beauty in all that is admitting it too others.
I want to share my story. I want to be vulnerable and expose my weaknesses. I want to keep on loving God every day and following His word and will for my life. I want to forgive and learn to love like God. I want others to see the Holy Spirit in me.
I have a long ways to go, but I have come a long ways.
Thank you God for a beautiful day. As I watch this season change I honestly can't wait to trust You and see what You have in store for me in my next season. A season where I hold Your hand.
Love,
Brittany
As doors close, friendships end, love is lost, and life is forcing change on me; I find myself almost sickly satisfied. I am a person who thrives on adventure but enjoys having stability. It's always been a love/hate relationship. I remember my last day of high school, naturally me being the emotional being I am, cried. I cried because it was over. It was like a perfect relationship that had to end for no reason. The life, person, and everything I had worked for the past 4 years I had to leave. What would be my identity? Well here I am again, only 4 years later and a lot more life experiences under my belt. Yet, I can't help but recognize the season changing.
I can not decide if I am happy or sad that this season is over for me. College has been full of good and bad. A lot of lessons learned and overall I am thankful for how God has shown me things throughout these years. I am thankful for the people He has blessed me with that He knew would be part of my story.
My story.
I suddenly just smiled. My story is still not finished. This is just a chapter and I think I feel sickly satisfied to be able to turn the page, this time with God's help. He definitely had to work for my heart but it is His!!! His love is the best. Yesterday I randomly opened my Bible like I love to do because God is always speaking to me.
"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, the I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
I JUST LOVE THIS. Seriously, it may be one of my life verses. When I reflect on everything my heart has been through to reach this point I just kinda laugh and say really God?! But I know it was the only way He would fully get my attention. I am still weak and everyday I get a little bit stronger. I still make mistakes and I know I am not perfect. But the beauty in all that is admitting it too others.
I want to share my story. I want to be vulnerable and expose my weaknesses. I want to keep on loving God every day and following His word and will for my life. I want to forgive and learn to love like God. I want others to see the Holy Spirit in me.
I have a long ways to go, but I have come a long ways.
Thank you God for a beautiful day. As I watch this season change I honestly can't wait to trust You and see what You have in store for me in my next season. A season where I hold Your hand.
Love,
Brittany
Thursday, April 24, 2014
Thoughts I Ponder
Sometimes it amazes me the thoughts that You put in my head God. Like what if tomorrow was my last day on Earth. Would I be able to trust You fully and not be afraid to die. But isn't dying the most beautiful thing on Earth that we can do here. When we die we are one step closer to seeing and knowing You. Meeting You. I think that is really exciting but my human heart is scared.
Have I made an impact on people up to this point in my life?
If I died tomorrow would people say good things or bad things about me? It doesn't matter. What truly matters is where I stand with You. Where my heart is when I take my final breath. I want it to be believing in You.
You have done such great things in my life over this past year. It has been difficult at times to see Your light and to truly understand what You are doing but i'm starting to get it. And get it well. It's really cool how much I want to pursue You. Yes, I will mess up. Yes, I will fail You. Yes, I will always have things I can improve on.
My favorite part about being Your best friend is that You always forgive me, believe in me, and wants what is best for me. You tell me the truth. Give me answers and make all things beautiful in it's time. Including myself.
I feel You giving me new desires for my life. Desires to follow You, share Your word, and rely on You completely. I used to think I knew what made me happy in life and what my future profession was going to be. But with You all things are possible. You know the desires of my heart and I trust You to guide me and lead me. I know You will never not provide.
I am so excited for JAX. I pray you make me vulnerable. I want to share my story. You gave me a story to share. Thank you for blessing me with the new friends in my life.
It is never too late.
Love,
Brittany
Have I made an impact on people up to this point in my life?
If I died tomorrow would people say good things or bad things about me? It doesn't matter. What truly matters is where I stand with You. Where my heart is when I take my final breath. I want it to be believing in You.
You have done such great things in my life over this past year. It has been difficult at times to see Your light and to truly understand what You are doing but i'm starting to get it. And get it well. It's really cool how much I want to pursue You. Yes, I will mess up. Yes, I will fail You. Yes, I will always have things I can improve on.
My favorite part about being Your best friend is that You always forgive me, believe in me, and wants what is best for me. You tell me the truth. Give me answers and make all things beautiful in it's time. Including myself.
I feel You giving me new desires for my life. Desires to follow You, share Your word, and rely on You completely. I used to think I knew what made me happy in life and what my future profession was going to be. But with You all things are possible. You know the desires of my heart and I trust You to guide me and lead me. I know You will never not provide.
I am so excited for JAX. I pray you make me vulnerable. I want to share my story. You gave me a story to share. Thank you for blessing me with the new friends in my life.
It is never too late.
Love,
Brittany
Tuesday, April 22, 2014
Failure.
Oh how I fail the God I love.
I fail Him often and in times and ways that I never intend.
I need to choose Him. Choose Him always.
I apologize for ways I have failed. But I know that I will fail again, and again, and again.
Living in God, with God, loving like God is hard. It's suppose to be hard.
The road to righteousness is not meant to be easy. I pray God guides my words, thoughts, and actions. I don't like failure. Help me overcome.
Day by Day.
--Brittany
I fail Him often and in times and ways that I never intend.
I need to choose Him. Choose Him always.
I apologize for ways I have failed. But I know that I will fail again, and again, and again.
Living in God, with God, loving like God is hard. It's suppose to be hard.
The road to righteousness is not meant to be easy. I pray God guides my words, thoughts, and actions. I don't like failure. Help me overcome.
Day by Day.
--Brittany
Friday, April 18, 2014
Carrying the Cross on campus because the One who died for sin, knew no sin.
God keeps putting things on my heart. Thoughts, words, actions that ultimately push me outside of my comfort zone. It's amazing I use to hold back from these thoughts but lately I have realized that I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Today I grasp another opportunity that God laid on my heart. To join a group of students with the Navigators to help carry a 200 lb. cross across campus.
I have never experienced something more real, humbling, and powerful.
As I arrived at church this morning I did not know what to think. I become thankful that I have a heart that loves people because I have had to introduce myself to a lot of strangers lately. But the best thing about Christians that I am experiencing is the overwhelming amount of love that flows from their beings. Before we went out we read passages from Isaiah and Mark by doing so we prepared our hearts for the task at hand.
The cross was heavy to carry but the weight of our sins is heavier than imaginable.
As we stepped onto campus with the cross and the stares started I suddenly felt emotion. Not just a little emotion. ALOT as in tears forming in my eyes.
It was surreal the stares and looks we got. Some people took it in, look upon in somber and encouragement. Others you could tell were trying to ignore the fact we were even there. It is amazing how diverse a campus and it's people can be to certain topics. I usually shy away from having an open opinion on things so maybe that is why this morning when I was standing up for what I believe in it hit me so hard.
I am happy that I did not shy away from this task God put on my heart. Carrying His cross was hard. I made it a ways before I could feel it wobble. As I was carrying it these thoughts crossed my mind:
1. Wow this is heavy, I must keep going.
2. This is real. I am glad I pushed myself out of my comfort-zone.
3. Jesus loves me.
4. I carry the cross because I am a sinner.
-I have never experienced something more humbling.
I'm learning to care less about what others may think. People are not scary. I just want to continue to follow my heart to what I find making me happy. Right now that is God. I'm falling in love with God every day. And I LOVE IT.
This past year as I touch base on a lot---it just marvels me how God has shown me Him. It makes my heart happy, I want to make His heart happy.
Carrying the cross today on campus is an experience that will forever live in my heart. It gives me a real perspective to approach Good Friday with today. He died for me. For my sins. For your sins. For the sins of the world. He did this with out complaining for He knew His Father's will.
It is done.
-Thank you Jesus.
Love,
Brittany
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Overwhelmed.
Here I am again. Feeling overwhelmed and filled with love for God. This is what I truly find so much happiness in these days. The days where I feel close to Him. Making decisions that I know are right in His eyes.
He is my best friend. I think this is something that I take for granted so often. I am a natural talker, giver, and lover. Why have I not seen that the one person who loves me the most is still here with me (despite my mistakes), He loves me beyond any human feeling that I could ever possess.
How beautiful.
I love love. God's love is the best love. I need to see that. Sometimes I feel like in life all I want is love from others and to give my love to others. But honestly, the more I am realizing things, seeing the big picture. I need to thank you God.
Thank You for not giving me what I thought was right. This excites me in ways I never thought my broken heart would be able to comprehend. It means when the time is right You will bring me to not good, but better. I can't wait.
Today I read the beginning of Revelation. I find myself questioning a lot of things in life. A lot of things in the Bible. And just a lot of times where I find my mind wondering asking myself what do I believe. As I read I seriously started to cry. The words I was reading painted a perfect picture of the Lord's second coming. It was scary, real, and beautiful all at the same time.
Faith must live in me and in my heart. I want it to overwhelm every aspect of my being. I want to be overwhelmed with a love for the short life I live and find purpose in each day.
Who knows, today could be your last day.
Don't wait.
Love God now.
Help me to continue to be overwhelmed by the beautiful never ending love that you give me daily. I loved last night when I asked You for a hug at Greekside and I felt it. I felt it strong and I know that You just want me to continue to pursue You. Keep holding my hand.
I love you Lord.
-Brittany
He is my best friend. I think this is something that I take for granted so often. I am a natural talker, giver, and lover. Why have I not seen that the one person who loves me the most is still here with me (despite my mistakes), He loves me beyond any human feeling that I could ever possess.
How beautiful.
I love love. God's love is the best love. I need to see that. Sometimes I feel like in life all I want is love from others and to give my love to others. But honestly, the more I am realizing things, seeing the big picture. I need to thank you God.
Thank You for not giving me what I thought was right. This excites me in ways I never thought my broken heart would be able to comprehend. It means when the time is right You will bring me to not good, but better. I can't wait.
Today I read the beginning of Revelation. I find myself questioning a lot of things in life. A lot of things in the Bible. And just a lot of times where I find my mind wondering asking myself what do I believe. As I read I seriously started to cry. The words I was reading painted a perfect picture of the Lord's second coming. It was scary, real, and beautiful all at the same time.
Faith must live in me and in my heart. I want it to overwhelm every aspect of my being. I want to be overwhelmed with a love for the short life I live and find purpose in each day.
Who knows, today could be your last day.
Don't wait.
Love God now.
Help me to continue to be overwhelmed by the beautiful never ending love that you give me daily. I loved last night when I asked You for a hug at Greekside and I felt it. I felt it strong and I know that You just want me to continue to pursue You. Keep holding my hand.
I love you Lord.
-Brittany
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
Center of It-Chris August
This song spoke to my heart today. Gives me such hope. :) God wants to hold my hand to help me back up.
-------When I rise, when I fall, You will be there for it all. --------
In the loss, in the win,
In the beauty and the sin,
At the start, at the end,
In the center of, the center of it.
This song spoke to my heart today. Gives me such hope. :) God wants to hold my hand to help me back up.
-------When I rise, when I fall, You will be there for it all. --------
In the loss, in the win,
In the beauty and the sin,
At the start, at the end,
In the center of, the center of it.
Live for Love
Hello, Hello.
I am letting emotion get the best of me today. I pray that God gives me the strength to live happy within His presence.
I wanted to share with you an accomplishment and a tear that rolled down my cheek last night at Gamma Phi chapter meeting. Yes, I finally got the love book written to me. Miss Hannah Riggle has shown me such love and compassion always, but more recently. I admire her and how driven and passion for Christ and the multitude of questions that she always wants to ask. She started to speak and I knew it was me.
"This girl I have just more recently become close too but I have truly admired her craft skills and fashion sense since freshman year, this one's for you Miss Brittany Nelson...."
I know I have not always been the strongest personality in the house and many times I wish I would of let girls get to know me better but at the same time I have always cherished the opportunities and memories that I will hold onto of the sisterhood. Hannah said such kind words about me speaking that I have the most genuine bright smile and I always make others feel included and loved. I always see the best in every person and circumstance. She is excited for me this summer going to JAX and knows that God is doing big things in my life.
It is beyond touching to hear words as these spoken to you. The tear that rolled down my face was one of happiness that others see me as these words.
I want my life to look like Your love, Christ. I struggle many times but I like to feel like at the end of the day my heart is in the right place. Life with out love is nothing. I want to live for love.
Love for God. Love for myself. Love for others. Love for life. A beautiful life.
Every day is a blessing. No matter what my circumstances or how my human heart is feeling I need to see the hope in the future and love the unknown. God wants to use me. I must be thankful for the challenges He has faced me with because this is His way of showing me that He is not done with me. I have room to grow as a person.
Thank you God. I may not understand now but someday I will.
-Brittany
I am letting emotion get the best of me today. I pray that God gives me the strength to live happy within His presence.
I wanted to share with you an accomplishment and a tear that rolled down my cheek last night at Gamma Phi chapter meeting. Yes, I finally got the love book written to me. Miss Hannah Riggle has shown me such love and compassion always, but more recently. I admire her and how driven and passion for Christ and the multitude of questions that she always wants to ask. She started to speak and I knew it was me.
"This girl I have just more recently become close too but I have truly admired her craft skills and fashion sense since freshman year, this one's for you Miss Brittany Nelson...."
I know I have not always been the strongest personality in the house and many times I wish I would of let girls get to know me better but at the same time I have always cherished the opportunities and memories that I will hold onto of the sisterhood. Hannah said such kind words about me speaking that I have the most genuine bright smile and I always make others feel included and loved. I always see the best in every person and circumstance. She is excited for me this summer going to JAX and knows that God is doing big things in my life.
It is beyond touching to hear words as these spoken to you. The tear that rolled down my face was one of happiness that others see me as these words.
I want my life to look like Your love, Christ. I struggle many times but I like to feel like at the end of the day my heart is in the right place. Life with out love is nothing. I want to live for love.
Love for God. Love for myself. Love for others. Love for life. A beautiful life.
Every day is a blessing. No matter what my circumstances or how my human heart is feeling I need to see the hope in the future and love the unknown. God wants to use me. I must be thankful for the challenges He has faced me with because this is His way of showing me that He is not done with me. I have room to grow as a person.
Thank you God. I may not understand now but someday I will.
-Brittany
Sunday, April 13, 2014
Change
Lately I have found myself pondering the many aspects of the current situations and endings in my life that I will be faced with, simply said things will be changing. I have been thinking about the things that I need to change, the things that I can not change, the change that is inevitable, and the change I will need to accept.
I must remember that change can be a good thing.
I always feel attached to the seasons of my life. Thinking about being a senior brings back emotion in me that I felt four years ago. Here I am again where I must say goodbye to people and places and the way things have been the past four years. College is coming to an end?
Did I make the most of it?
Yes. Sure there were many missed activities, events, and people that I could of invested my time into. But I have full faith that God's plan for my college career was in His hands. He has taught me so much, sometimes in the most painful ways, but I know that He is shaping me into the woman of God I was intended to be.
I am not the same person I was last year at this time. It amazes me how much better I know myself, my purpose, and my strength.
My heart is strong, forgiving, and loving. I love my heart. Sure, I have my bad days where I am completely human and think/do sinful things towards others but my pure nature is giving and loving and nothing makes my heart more happy.
Maybe that is why I am sad that this season is coming to a close. That many of my friends will be relocating and that it will be up to us to decide the friendship. I think my loving heart wants to keep giving.
Change is good if you see it in the perspective of being right and just. I do not fear the future. God holds me by His right hand.
I must remember that change can be a good thing.
I always feel attached to the seasons of my life. Thinking about being a senior brings back emotion in me that I felt four years ago. Here I am again where I must say goodbye to people and places and the way things have been the past four years. College is coming to an end?
Did I make the most of it?
Yes. Sure there were many missed activities, events, and people that I could of invested my time into. But I have full faith that God's plan for my college career was in His hands. He has taught me so much, sometimes in the most painful ways, but I know that He is shaping me into the woman of God I was intended to be.
I am not the same person I was last year at this time. It amazes me how much better I know myself, my purpose, and my strength.
My heart is strong, forgiving, and loving. I love my heart. Sure, I have my bad days where I am completely human and think/do sinful things towards others but my pure nature is giving and loving and nothing makes my heart more happy.
Maybe that is why I am sad that this season is coming to a close. That many of my friends will be relocating and that it will be up to us to decide the friendship. I think my loving heart wants to keep giving.
Change is good if you see it in the perspective of being right and just. I do not fear the future. God holds me by His right hand.
Thursday, April 10, 2014
Room to improve.
I want to title this post being completely blunt and honest with myself. I have a ton of room to grow. Walking with Christ will never be easy. I am learning first hand the many struggles that I face. Just when I think or feel like I have myself together my actions don't match my words and I lose sight of God's love for me.
I have room to improve.
When I feel like I let God down it also takes me time to realize that he still loves me. Just because I make many mistakes does not mean that His hand isn't still extended to me. I need to grasp it and I need to hold it firmly.
There are many areas in my life I need to work on. I need to have self-control and not let alcohol influence me in selfish sinful ways. It is hard for me but admitting it to myself and asking for help from faithful friends is the only way I feel I will be able to overcome these sins.
Clear eyes. Full hearts. Can't lose.
When I have clear eyes and a heart full of love for God. I know that is something I can not lose.
So pray for me. Today, tomorrow, always that I will continue to admit my flaws and improve upon them.
-Brittany
I have room to improve.
When I feel like I let God down it also takes me time to realize that he still loves me. Just because I make many mistakes does not mean that His hand isn't still extended to me. I need to grasp it and I need to hold it firmly.
There are many areas in my life I need to work on. I need to have self-control and not let alcohol influence me in selfish sinful ways. It is hard for me but admitting it to myself and asking for help from faithful friends is the only way I feel I will be able to overcome these sins.
Clear eyes. Full hearts. Can't lose.
When I have clear eyes and a heart full of love for God. I know that is something I can not lose.
So pray for me. Today, tomorrow, always that I will continue to admit my flaws and improve upon them.
-Brittany
Monday, April 7, 2014
Compelled to write.
I feel compelled. Here I am laying in bed, I have 3 test tomorrow and should be studying BUT nothing in me more feels the need to just write every thought that is on my heart tonight.
I want to take the time to be thankful. One of the first things that I am thankful for tonight is that I have the heart for writing down my love of life.
Sometimes my biggest breakthroughs and answers come when I simply write without an end goal or purpose. Simply to just write whatever I am feeling at the time. I pull out journal entries from years ago and when I read them I realize how much I have learned and grown since I wrote them. Nostalgically though they take me back to that exact moment and time in my life when I was writing them. Sometimes this feeling is one of joy and other times it is bitter sweet. All in all it makes me realize just how much God has always been working in my life. And just how much I never saw the real picture when I was trying to control my life.
I am thankful for my mistakes. I am thankful for the people God has put into my life; blessings and lessons. I am beyond thankful that God is pursuing me so hard right now that the peace I'm finding is unreal. He definitely is always up to something. Every time I think I know I realize I knew nothing at all. When I read what I wrote and then read another entry 4 months later it makes me realize the beautiful and unpredictable life I live.
I wouldn't have it any other way. God gave me the heart for writing that I can have tangible words that are from my soul speaking. If I would die tomorrow I would want people to read the notes I have written to God about life, the hopeless yet "I can't wait to love the shit out of you & pray for you often" book of notes I write for my future husband, and many random thoughts I often find myself jotting down in class or at the strangest moments when I suddenly get the urge too.
I would want people to read these things because I feel when I write I give a little piece of my heart into it each time. There is nothing more vulnerable than that very thing---giving pieces of your heart to others.
This leads me compelled to write is the best way possible.
I have a lot to give. A lot of love to give. Why have I not been giving it to the one who loves me most?
Aww! I just know that God is doing great things in my life and heart right now. I just need to keep focusing on Him and finding comfort and peace in His plan for my life.
Love,
Brittany
I want to take the time to be thankful. One of the first things that I am thankful for tonight is that I have the heart for writing down my love of life.
Sometimes my biggest breakthroughs and answers come when I simply write without an end goal or purpose. Simply to just write whatever I am feeling at the time. I pull out journal entries from years ago and when I read them I realize how much I have learned and grown since I wrote them. Nostalgically though they take me back to that exact moment and time in my life when I was writing them. Sometimes this feeling is one of joy and other times it is bitter sweet. All in all it makes me realize just how much God has always been working in my life. And just how much I never saw the real picture when I was trying to control my life.
I am thankful for my mistakes. I am thankful for the people God has put into my life; blessings and lessons. I am beyond thankful that God is pursuing me so hard right now that the peace I'm finding is unreal. He definitely is always up to something. Every time I think I know I realize I knew nothing at all. When I read what I wrote and then read another entry 4 months later it makes me realize the beautiful and unpredictable life I live.
I wouldn't have it any other way. God gave me the heart for writing that I can have tangible words that are from my soul speaking. If I would die tomorrow I would want people to read the notes I have written to God about life, the hopeless yet "I can't wait to love the shit out of you & pray for you often" book of notes I write for my future husband, and many random thoughts I often find myself jotting down in class or at the strangest moments when I suddenly get the urge too.
I would want people to read these things because I feel when I write I give a little piece of my heart into it each time. There is nothing more vulnerable than that very thing---giving pieces of your heart to others.
This leads me compelled to write is the best way possible.
I have a lot to give. A lot of love to give. Why have I not been giving it to the one who loves me most?
Aww! I just know that God is doing great things in my life and heart right now. I just need to keep focusing on Him and finding comfort and peace in His plan for my life.
Love,
Brittany
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Unanswered Answers
Can you truly have answers that are unanswered? Like not having a definite answer is perfectly the correct answer to have? Lately, this is the thought I have pondered. A thought that coming from a "self proclaimed control freak" is not something that likely crosses my mind. I use to think things should be like this, go this way, and everything in life will work out just as planned.
But God's plan is the best plan. The best part about his plan, we have no idea what He has in store for us. This has lead me to have peace with unanswered answers. What would the fun be in life if the answers were at the back of the book. I almost feel like it would diminish multitude areas of life that we must live through and experience to find, know, and understand God's will for us. He doesn't want to give us answers until He has an answer to give.
God has perfect timing.
It is not our own timing.
Something that I see God really showing me is how to have an all knowing patient heart with those I care most about. It is hard sometimes to want to question why God is bringing me to these trials, why He is teaching me my lessons the hard way, why He doesn't give me the direct answers that I want. It would be easy to become simply angry with Him. But why, what would be the point in anger. There is none.
Trusting Him is a beautiful thing and nothing gives my heart more peace. I know if I focus on Him and love Him first and foremost that He will give me all of my hearts desires. He knows me. Nobody knows me better. This I can only thank Him for the ways He had to pursue me hard.
I am getting eager, anxious, and sadden about the approach of the life I know now ending. Another chapter in my life closing. Another goodbye to a unknown future. What is next in my life? Who will God put in my story? How will I change from the woman I am today to the woman I will be a year from now?
The unanswered answer, only God knows. And i'm perfectly okay with this.
-Love,
Brittany
But God's plan is the best plan. The best part about his plan, we have no idea what He has in store for us. This has lead me to have peace with unanswered answers. What would the fun be in life if the answers were at the back of the book. I almost feel like it would diminish multitude areas of life that we must live through and experience to find, know, and understand God's will for us. He doesn't want to give us answers until He has an answer to give.
God has perfect timing.
It is not our own timing.
Something that I see God really showing me is how to have an all knowing patient heart with those I care most about. It is hard sometimes to want to question why God is bringing me to these trials, why He is teaching me my lessons the hard way, why He doesn't give me the direct answers that I want. It would be easy to become simply angry with Him. But why, what would be the point in anger. There is none.
Trusting Him is a beautiful thing and nothing gives my heart more peace. I know if I focus on Him and love Him first and foremost that He will give me all of my hearts desires. He knows me. Nobody knows me better. This I can only thank Him for the ways He had to pursue me hard.
I am getting eager, anxious, and sadden about the approach of the life I know now ending. Another chapter in my life closing. Another goodbye to a unknown future. What is next in my life? Who will God put in my story? How will I change from the woman I am today to the woman I will be a year from now?
The unanswered answer, only God knows. And i'm perfectly okay with this.
-Love,
Brittany
Monday, March 31, 2014
2 steps forward, 1 step back
Sometimes it is hard for me to fully comprehend and understand my life. This is probably a typical statement of most humans. It's like I come so far with God, feel so close to Him, only to fall back into old habits and sinful nature. I find myself in control again. When I am in control that is when my world crashes down. So why is it so hard just to let God ALWAYS be in control? Especially when I find such peace in His plan?
Because I am human.
We were created in God's image. We were made to mirror Him. I think one thing about God that I have been learning and fully grasping is the God also has emotion. We make him happy, sad, confused, excited, lonely, mad, and any and all in between. That is why it is okay to feel emotion.
Sometimes I think I feel too much emotion.
Like sometimes I wish I cared less or cared more. That I would be able to just move forward without thinking about all the things I should've, could've, would've done in a different place or time. It is hard sometimes to find peace in our decisions. Confidence in life and love in the uncertain future. The only thing that is making sense to me right now is the unconditional everlasting Father God. He is my refuge and strength. I find my comfort in Him. Some days are better than others. I hope to find complete trust in Him everyday soon.
I need to let go of the things and people that weigh my heart down.
If I am reborn with new eyes I need to stop squinting with them. When they are fully open I become aware of the mercy and glory of God. When I squint I lose some of that focus.
Help me keep my eyes open.
God, You are with me. You are for me. You are my best friend. You hold my hand and direct my steps.
With all my love. Thank You.
-Brittany
Because I am human.
We were created in God's image. We were made to mirror Him. I think one thing about God that I have been learning and fully grasping is the God also has emotion. We make him happy, sad, confused, excited, lonely, mad, and any and all in between. That is why it is okay to feel emotion.
Sometimes I think I feel too much emotion.
Like sometimes I wish I cared less or cared more. That I would be able to just move forward without thinking about all the things I should've, could've, would've done in a different place or time. It is hard sometimes to find peace in our decisions. Confidence in life and love in the uncertain future. The only thing that is making sense to me right now is the unconditional everlasting Father God. He is my refuge and strength. I find my comfort in Him. Some days are better than others. I hope to find complete trust in Him everyday soon.
I need to let go of the things and people that weigh my heart down.
If I am reborn with new eyes I need to stop squinting with them. When they are fully open I become aware of the mercy and glory of God. When I squint I lose some of that focus.
Help me keep my eyes open.
God, You are with me. You are for me. You are my best friend. You hold my hand and direct my steps.
With all my love. Thank You.
-Brittany
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Clarity.
I feel like the word clarity can be both extremely satisfying and scary all at once. It is having the faith to accept the things that we can not change and let it go to God. For months now I feel as if I had clarity but my human heart full of self-control simply wanted to over look it. That I just did not want to choose to see the cold hard facts of life in front of me.
But honestly over the past 3 months the only thing that has made sense is God.
There was my clarity. I must trust in His plan for my life.
I really enjoy the song "All Along" by Remedy Drive. I think it just speaks to my heart is such powerful ways. Sometimes I get caught up in this search. A search for worldly desires that I know will never fully satisfy my heart, especially when separated from God. In the lyrics it talks about how God was always right there.
I know He was and I thank Him. He has seen every tear, heard every cry, and knows my heart.
All along I was looking for something more
You're so much more
My Heart rejoices in finding and accepting the One that I was always looking for.
Love,
Brittany
But honestly over the past 3 months the only thing that has made sense is God.
There was my clarity. I must trust in His plan for my life.
I really enjoy the song "All Along" by Remedy Drive. I think it just speaks to my heart is such powerful ways. Sometimes I get caught up in this search. A search for worldly desires that I know will never fully satisfy my heart, especially when separated from God. In the lyrics it talks about how God was always right there.
I know He was and I thank Him. He has seen every tear, heard every cry, and knows my heart.
It's not everything it seems, the world and its dreams
Slipping like water through my hands tonight
All the things I thought would fill me up inside
Left me empty here and now I know why
Slipping like water through my hands tonight
All the things I thought would fill me up inside
Left me empty here and now I know why
All along I was looking for something else
You're something else
All along I was looking for something more
You're so much more
I finally found what I could never see before
You've always been the one that I was looking for
You're something else
All along I was looking for something more
You're so much more
I finally found what I could never see before
You've always been the one that I was looking for
All of my castles in the sand, washed away again
And I'm left right where I began tonight
The only thing that can ever fill me up
Has been right in front of me all the time
And I'm left right where I began tonight
The only thing that can ever fill me up
Has been right in front of me all the time
All along I was looking for something else
You're something else
All along I was looking for something more
You're so much more
I finally found what I could never see before
You've always been the one that I was looking for
You're something else
All along I was looking for something more
You're so much more
I finally found what I could never see before
You've always been the one that I was looking for
And I won't miss you, I won't miss you this time
And I said I want you, how I want you in my life
And I said I want you, how I want you in my life
All along I was looking for something more
You're so much more
You're so much more
All along I was looking for something else
You're something else
You're something else
All along I was looking for something more
You're so much more
I finally found what I could never see before
You've always been the one that I was looking for
I finally found what I could never see before
You've always been the one that I was looking for
You've always been the one that I was looking for
I finally found what I could never see before
You've always been the one that I was looking for
My Heart rejoices in finding and accepting the One that I was always looking for.
Love,
Brittany
Wednesday, March 12, 2014
Trust. Peace. Joy. Intertwined.
It is hard to explain what God has been doing with my heart. I have been waking up with new clear eyes filled with love and joy for the world around me.
I'm starting to feel like myself again. Like the pain I once knew daily is slowly being washed away. My heart is breathing. I am spending time trusting God, finding peace, and letting joy radiate from my being.
I still struggle. I do not want to continue to live a double life but find the balance that is necessary when being a Christian. I know God's grace now but I also know that because I know He forgives it does not mean that He is happy when I continue to sin. I pray in my heart to become more conscious of my actions and sinful nature. I am human. But I am God's child.
When I spend time in the morning with God it brings me such excitement. There is always something to learn, a question to ask, and a way that I can flip to any random page in my Bible and find a verse that applies to my life.
The Bible is my new favorite book to read.
I am so excited for this summer. JAX will be an adventure. I have a feeling God is going to use me is ways that I can not even imagine or comprehend. I am excited to be surrounded by uplifting believers, people that I hope to learn from more and more. Even lately when I have been surrounding myself with people who love Jesus it brings me such joy. They have been accepting and simply them asking about my day brings a smile to my face.
Brothers and sisters in Christ show the most genuine love for life. I believe this is because we want to love like God.
This verse is something that I strive for and have seen become beyond applicable in my recent circumstances.
"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8
I love love. God's love.
When I intertwine trust, peace, and joy in my Savior my heart can love again, breathe again, believe again and hope. Hope in a future that only God's will can prevail.
Happy Wednesday.
-Brittany
I'm starting to feel like myself again. Like the pain I once knew daily is slowly being washed away. My heart is breathing. I am spending time trusting God, finding peace, and letting joy radiate from my being.
I still struggle. I do not want to continue to live a double life but find the balance that is necessary when being a Christian. I know God's grace now but I also know that because I know He forgives it does not mean that He is happy when I continue to sin. I pray in my heart to become more conscious of my actions and sinful nature. I am human. But I am God's child.
When I spend time in the morning with God it brings me such excitement. There is always something to learn, a question to ask, and a way that I can flip to any random page in my Bible and find a verse that applies to my life.
The Bible is my new favorite book to read.
I am so excited for this summer. JAX will be an adventure. I have a feeling God is going to use me is ways that I can not even imagine or comprehend. I am excited to be surrounded by uplifting believers, people that I hope to learn from more and more. Even lately when I have been surrounding myself with people who love Jesus it brings me such joy. They have been accepting and simply them asking about my day brings a smile to my face.
Brothers and sisters in Christ show the most genuine love for life. I believe this is because we want to love like God.
This verse is something that I strive for and have seen become beyond applicable in my recent circumstances.
"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8
I love love. God's love.
When I intertwine trust, peace, and joy in my Savior my heart can love again, breathe again, believe again and hope. Hope in a future that only God's will can prevail.
Happy Wednesday.
-Brittany
Wednesday, March 5, 2014
Befriending the enemy.
Spending time with God has become literally my favorite part of my day. I never knew that establishing a routine of forming a personal relationship with Him could bring me such joy. Many things spoke to me today letting me know that I am healing, growing, and trusting Him. When I trust Him I find the peace and joy that only He can bring to my life.
Today's devotion made me cry almost has hard as on January 8th when I first decided to hold the Lord's hand. He is always speaking to me and it is almost ironic how spot on and relevant to my life His words are to my heart. Today's devotion brought to light everything that has happened to me and gave me reassurance that where I am, right now, today, is exactly where God has always intended me to be.
________________________________________________________________________________
March 5th
"MAKE FRIENDS WITH THE PROBLEMS IN YOUR LIFE. Though many things feel random and wrong, remember that I am sovereign over everything. I can fit everything into a pattern for good, but only to the extent the you trust Me. Every problem can teach you something, transforming you little by little into the masterpiece I created you to be. The very same problem can become a stumbling block over which you fall if you react with distrust and defiance. The choice is up to you, and you will have to choose many times each day whether to trust Me or defy Me.
The best way to befriend your problems is to thank Me for them. This simple act opens your mind to the possibility of benefits flowing from your difficulties. You can even give persistent problems flowing from your difficulties. You can even give persistent problems nicknames, helping you to approach them with familiarity rather than with dread. The next step is to introduce them to Me, enabling Me to embrace them in My loving Presence. I will not necessarily remove your problems, but My wisdom is sufficient to bring good out of every one of them.
_________________________________________________________________________________
How cool is our God. It's a slow realization how much my problems have become my closest friends. They consume my time and my mind and through them I have been able to find comfort and peace in my Savior. The darkness brings forth His light. It is scary but when I think about my life and the trials I have recently lived through, I know for a fact that I would not feel this close to God if those problems had never occurred. So should I be thankful for these new found friends, yes. Even in the midst of confusion I must find understanding that this is God's will.
Tonight I went to Catholic Mass for the Lent service. I have been expanding my horizons lately and although there are many things that bother me about the Catholic faith I know that in the end we all worship the same God no matter what laws of the word we believe. I want to learn to love like God and be a friend in Christ to those that I find it the hardest to forgive. But as in the Lord's Prayer I pray and confirm in my heart "Forgive those who trespass against us." In this I am finding peace. Peace in things that I do not understand or have concrete answers too. Being a friend and supporting the growth of faith in those I love makes my heart happy. God is the only way that I can make sense out of certain feelings and thoughts that I have recently been experiencing. It is exciting to be able to share with others all that I am learning about His Word.
The Holy Spirit is living in me. I am holding God's right hand. My heart is becoming filled with praise and thanksgiving for the life that I am living: past, present & future.
Happy Season of Lent! Indeed, it is good to be alive and to know His grace and mercy. I pray that God continues to let His light shine in me. That He uses me as an instrument for His kingdom.
Most of all, I pray for peace within my circumstances. My problems are my friends.
I love you Lord.
-Brittany
Today's devotion made me cry almost has hard as on January 8th when I first decided to hold the Lord's hand. He is always speaking to me and it is almost ironic how spot on and relevant to my life His words are to my heart. Today's devotion brought to light everything that has happened to me and gave me reassurance that where I am, right now, today, is exactly where God has always intended me to be.
________________________________________________________________________________
March 5th
"MAKE FRIENDS WITH THE PROBLEMS IN YOUR LIFE. Though many things feel random and wrong, remember that I am sovereign over everything. I can fit everything into a pattern for good, but only to the extent the you trust Me. Every problem can teach you something, transforming you little by little into the masterpiece I created you to be. The very same problem can become a stumbling block over which you fall if you react with distrust and defiance. The choice is up to you, and you will have to choose many times each day whether to trust Me or defy Me.
The best way to befriend your problems is to thank Me for them. This simple act opens your mind to the possibility of benefits flowing from your difficulties. You can even give persistent problems flowing from your difficulties. You can even give persistent problems nicknames, helping you to approach them with familiarity rather than with dread. The next step is to introduce them to Me, enabling Me to embrace them in My loving Presence. I will not necessarily remove your problems, but My wisdom is sufficient to bring good out of every one of them.
_________________________________________________________________________________
How cool is our God. It's a slow realization how much my problems have become my closest friends. They consume my time and my mind and through them I have been able to find comfort and peace in my Savior. The darkness brings forth His light. It is scary but when I think about my life and the trials I have recently lived through, I know for a fact that I would not feel this close to God if those problems had never occurred. So should I be thankful for these new found friends, yes. Even in the midst of confusion I must find understanding that this is God's will.
Tonight I went to Catholic Mass for the Lent service. I have been expanding my horizons lately and although there are many things that bother me about the Catholic faith I know that in the end we all worship the same God no matter what laws of the word we believe. I want to learn to love like God and be a friend in Christ to those that I find it the hardest to forgive. But as in the Lord's Prayer I pray and confirm in my heart "Forgive those who trespass against us." In this I am finding peace. Peace in things that I do not understand or have concrete answers too. Being a friend and supporting the growth of faith in those I love makes my heart happy. God is the only way that I can make sense out of certain feelings and thoughts that I have recently been experiencing. It is exciting to be able to share with others all that I am learning about His Word.
The Holy Spirit is living in me. I am holding God's right hand. My heart is becoming filled with praise and thanksgiving for the life that I am living: past, present & future.
Happy Season of Lent! Indeed, it is good to be alive and to know His grace and mercy. I pray that God continues to let His light shine in me. That He uses me as an instrument for His kingdom.
Most of all, I pray for peace within my circumstances. My problems are my friends.
I love you Lord.
-Brittany
Monday, February 24, 2014
Friday, February 21, 2014
She prayed for me.
Dear God.
Simply put, wow. The word wow is an understatement to the feeling that I feel. Thank you so much for having Jordann pray for me. Her prayers to invest in someone who needed her knowledge, care, and encouragement were fulfilled. Thank you for sparking in my heart to reach out to her. It has been a blessing beyond words. She is exactly the sister in Christ that I needed to find. It brought tears to my eyes when she told me that she had prayed for me.
That simple day over Christmas break in Stromsburg, NE when you spoke to my heart. I knew she was the person you wanted me to reach out too. Thank you. I'm so glad I listened.
Everyday I am learning.When I put aside the things that I can not control and focus on you I am at peace. You keep telling me to hold your right hand. Your hand is my favorite to hold. I'm sorry that I did not hold onto it sooner. I just have a feeling that we will do such great things with this relationship.
Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow. Thank you. You are always with me. There is no greater joy than that unknown for which You have planned for my life.
Keep me in Your heart, my heart is where I will keep You.
Love,
Brittany
Simply put, wow. The word wow is an understatement to the feeling that I feel. Thank you so much for having Jordann pray for me. Her prayers to invest in someone who needed her knowledge, care, and encouragement were fulfilled. Thank you for sparking in my heart to reach out to her. It has been a blessing beyond words. She is exactly the sister in Christ that I needed to find. It brought tears to my eyes when she told me that she had prayed for me.
That simple day over Christmas break in Stromsburg, NE when you spoke to my heart. I knew she was the person you wanted me to reach out too. Thank you. I'm so glad I listened.
Everyday I am learning.When I put aside the things that I can not control and focus on you I am at peace. You keep telling me to hold your right hand. Your hand is my favorite to hold. I'm sorry that I did not hold onto it sooner. I just have a feeling that we will do such great things with this relationship.
Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow. Thank you. You are always with me. There is no greater joy than that unknown for which You have planned for my life.
Keep me in Your heart, my heart is where I will keep You.
Love,
Brittany
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
You Bled (Jesus Loves Me) -Rend Collective Experiment
You bled your heart out
Now I feel love beat in my chest
How wonderful
You gave your beauty
In exchange for my ugliness
How wonderful
You left your perfection
And embraced our rejection
How marvellous, how boundless
Is Your love, is Your love
How wonderful, sacrificial
Is Your love for me
You put on our chains
Sent us out through the open door
How wonderful
You took our sadness
Crowned us with joy and real peace
How wonderful
You left Your perfection
And fought for our redemption
Yes Jesus loves me
Yes Jesus loves me
How wonderful
Yes Jesus loves me
This is love
You gave Yourself
Now I feel love beat in my chest
How wonderful
You gave your beauty
In exchange for my ugliness
How wonderful
You left your perfection
And embraced our rejection
How marvellous, how boundless
Is Your love, is Your love
How wonderful, sacrificial
Is Your love for me
You put on our chains
Sent us out through the open door
How wonderful
You took our sadness
Crowned us with joy and real peace
How wonderful
You left Your perfection
And fought for our redemption
Yes Jesus loves me
Yes Jesus loves me
How wonderful
Yes Jesus loves me
This is love
You gave Yourself
Monday, February 17, 2014
Desires of the flesh.
How do we be in the world but not of the world? This is the question that I have been pondering on my heart. There is many times I fall into sin and want to control my life. This is something that I need to work on.
I know God fully wants me to grab His hand and give Him my whole heart.
This past year has been by far the craziest, most challenging, and most rewarding of my life. God is doing things with my heart, I just need to listen.
It is hard. Life will always be hard. I'm asking Him today to give me that peace and comfort that I only feel with His arms and Him living within my heart. When I put Him first everything else in my life becomes more clear.
When I hand over my burdens of this world to Him it is a realization of a beautiful friendship where I know His love will never give up on me. This week I hope to find that focus of a beautiful life full of love with Him.
I must let go of the things I can not change and the people that are constantly bringing me down and away from God.
Amen.
-Brittany
Monday, February 10, 2014
Out Loud.
Philippians 4:6-7 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Praying out loud has never been something that I considered myself "good" at. Then again, what actually constitutes a good prayer. Prayer comes from your heart, it has to be something that lives inside of you. The beautiful thing about prayer to me is that you can pray about anything and everything. God is always listening. Pray for the wonderful simple things in life and the perpetual problems. Pray for those whom are your best friends and those whom are your enemies. Once you start saying things out loud it will always makes sense. Prayer is powerful. Prayer is real. I want to learn to pray "good".
God laid it on my heart today to pray for someone I feel very close too. He wanted me to pray out loud to this person. I did not know if I could do it, but I have never held back from this person before so why today. As the words flowed off my lips, I could feel God's presence. He was there and that is what makes my heart so happy. I felt so much better being courageous and being able to share my thoughts with those I love. It is such joy to find comfort in the presence of the Lord.
His will and way for my life I must trust. When He speaks to me I want to listen.
Every day I am learning and I am growing. I can feel my heart changing. I always feel like God is bringing me through this pain so I can find such joy and love in Him. Only Him.
Baby steps are still BIG steps. Sharing my faith and what I am learning makes my soul smile.
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
To beat again.
Today, I am telling my heart to beat again. For so many days now I have found my strength is the Lord, yet the pain of a heavy heart has been present. Where is my "happy go-lucky" self that I love with all my heart. That other people love.
This will not slow me down.
God wants me to see the hope. This is why He always gives me the people I need at the time I need them. This I thank him for so much.
-Brittany
This will not slow me down.
God wants me to see the hope. This is why He always gives me the people I need at the time I need them. This I thank him for so much.
-Brittany
Sunday, February 2, 2014
Find time to rest.
Often times I find myself wanting to live a life full of "busy" that I have this preconceived concept that if I am constantly doing something that I will find a life full of joy and fulfillment. I will feel like I have accomplished something for the good of myself and others. That being busy will bring me joy.
But God tells us many times that we need to "rest". This is a personal struggle of mine. Finding rest and peace in the quiet moments is something that I would like to enjoy and focus on more. Sundays have always been my favorite day of the week. My heart has always felt happy to be able to worship on Sunday morning and find that inner peace spending time with my Lord.
I love when I feel Your presence. It may be my new personal high. I feel it. The more I have been talking to God and growing in my faith, I feel Him. It is the best feeling. It is such a surreal moment that He has got my life in His hands. It is truly beautiful.
Being human though, it is hard not to want to be in control of my life. I use to always feel like I had things under control, that I ran the show, and that I had this all figured out. But I never did. I simply needed to hit rock bottom, broken hearted, helpless, for me to see the light. I love holding God's hand.
Rest. This week I would like to focus on finding rest. Slowing down, breathing, appreciating life, and just taking a moment to find rest with my Savior.
Love always.
Brittany
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Let my love look like You.
Hello.
Over the past week I have constantly been searching for answers. My heart has felt the overload of emotion, love, and confusion. It is only when I put my thoughts in trust in God that He gives me that peace. The same peace that I have been finding over the past 3 months. I can not let the sinful desires of my heart back into my life. I must be strong and courageous. I keep asking God how He wants me to love others. Right now I know that He wants my whole heart and that He wants me to fully pursue Him. How awesome is that!
He knows I have a huge heart filled with so much love to give and that He wants me to continue to bless those around me with it.
I asked Him today to put my mind at ease. To give me the right words to speak and to love like Him. This is my prayer today. I just want God to fill me with His spirit and purpose for my life.
So let my life be the proof
Over the past week I have constantly been searching for answers. My heart has felt the overload of emotion, love, and confusion. It is only when I put my thoughts in trust in God that He gives me that peace. The same peace that I have been finding over the past 3 months. I can not let the sinful desires of my heart back into my life. I must be strong and courageous. I keep asking God how He wants me to love others. Right now I know that He wants my whole heart and that He wants me to fully pursue Him. How awesome is that!
He knows I have a huge heart filled with so much love to give and that He wants me to continue to bless those around me with it.
I asked Him today to put my mind at ease. To give me the right words to speak and to love like Him. This is my prayer today. I just want God to fill me with His spirit and purpose for my life.
So let my life be the proof
The proof of Your love
Let my love look like You and what You're made of
How You lived, how You died
Love is sacrifice
So let my life be the proof,
The proof of Your love.
-For King & Country "The Proof of Your Love."
Love,
Brittany
Monday, January 27, 2014
Friday, January 10, 2014
Strong Enough by Matthew West
You must
You must think I'm strong
To give me what I'm going through
Well, forgive me
Forgive me if I'm wrong
But this looks like more than I can do
On my own
I know I'm not strong enough to be
everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
For the both of us
Well, maybe
Maybe that's the point
To reach the point of giving up
Cause when I'm finally
Finally at rock bottom
Well, that's when I start looking up
And reaching out
I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
Cause I'm broken
Down to nothing
But I'm still holding on to the one thing
You are God
and you are strong
When I am weak
I can do all things
Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don't have to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
I can do all things
Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don't have to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
Oh, yeah
I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
Strong enough
You must think I'm strong
To give me what I'm going through
Well, forgive me
Forgive me if I'm wrong
But this looks like more than I can do
On my own
I know I'm not strong enough to be
everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
For the both of us
Well, maybe
Maybe that's the point
To reach the point of giving up
Cause when I'm finally
Finally at rock bottom
Well, that's when I start looking up
And reaching out
I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
Cause I'm broken
Down to nothing
But I'm still holding on to the one thing
You are God
and you are strong
When I am weak
I can do all things
Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don't have to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
I can do all things
Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don't have to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
Oh, yeah
I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
Strong enough
Thursday, January 9, 2014
Fidelia! My Ghana child.
Hi! I am just so excited about this New Years Resolution that I took action on today! I am a sponsor for a 10 yr. old girl in Ghana. Her name is Fidelia, she has 3 brothers, her parents are farmers and we have the same birthday! How cool is it that I can help bless her just by giving $35/mo. and by writing her emails. This makes my heart so happy!
God is good!
God is good!
Our heart gets broken so God can repair it.
Today I have been thinking a lot about God's timing in my life. How the things that I wish would happen that I am thankful that they did not because I am seeing the beauty in trusting God's timing! A sister in Christ and I are going to encounter a journey of reading "Pursued" a book about God's unfailing divine obsession with us by Jud Wilhite. I became curious about the author today and randomly clicked on one of his sermons.
Just like always, God gives me what I needed to hear.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFn23kw41-U
God brings challenges to us in our lives so He can give us even more power to endure them than we thought was possible.
I begin my house arrest tomorrow. I know I am living through probably the lowest point in my life right now, but at the same time I see such joy and love coming from this darkness.
I trust you God. I am holding Your hand.
Also, read a great blog today that made me tear up, naturally because it was about love. But also something I have been thinking about a lot lately.
How great would it be to marry a guy who loves God! I want that. I want him to be praying for me like I pray for him.
Ladies, Marry A Man Who Prays
God will cross our paths when the time is right and until then I want to become a woman of God fully ready to love my earthly soulmate! How exciting:) I love love.
Peace&Blessings.
Thankful for another day.
-Brittany
Just like always, God gives me what I needed to hear.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFn23kw41-U
God brings challenges to us in our lives so He can give us even more power to endure them than we thought was possible.
I begin my house arrest tomorrow. I know I am living through probably the lowest point in my life right now, but at the same time I see such joy and love coming from this darkness.
I trust you God. I am holding Your hand.
Also, read a great blog today that made me tear up, naturally because it was about love. But also something I have been thinking about a lot lately.
How great would it be to marry a guy who loves God! I want that. I want him to be praying for me like I pray for him.
Ladies, Marry A Man Who Prays
God will cross our paths when the time is right and until then I want to become a woman of God fully ready to love my earthly soulmate! How exciting:) I love love.
Peace&Blessings.
Thankful for another day.
-Brittany
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Today I held His hand and fell in love.
January 8th,
2014
I think it is awesome that I can
sit down and document this day. The day I finally decided to hold the hand of
my Lord. He has been extending this hand to me for years. His presence I feel in times of trial and
pain, but also in joyous moments where I know He is with me and watching over
me.
Discussing my struggles out loud is
not something I have ever been good at. Actually, I would never consider myself
to have any “true struggles” before this year but I know that everything about
that statement is dead wrong. My struggles I just hid because I liked living my
life the way that I wanted to live. Many times in my life I have been to
concerned about my “image” but over this past year though I have learned so
much about the power of forgiveness. The image I want people to see me for is
composed of who I am. This means my triumphs, my mistakes, my values, my
passions, and my faith.
Over the past year I have
questioned what God is doing in my life. Why would He bring hurt and evil,
bring earthly love and taketh it away, expose me to nonbelievers, have my past
revisit me, and allow me to experience the death of a beloved loved one. I literally hit a point in this past year
where I remember waking up and wondering how my heart was still breathing. It
is true we may never understand what He is doing. Something about the strange
beauty of not understanding though is what makes us human. God himself is the
only one that is all knowing., so I believe we should let that be His job. The
path you have planned of course is not what He has planned, but loving God
means having faith in His bigger picture for my life. I know that all these
things He is using to shape me into the disciple that He wants me to be. I
needed to experience those things for me to truly open my eyes and receive His
grace and mercy. What a beautiful gift it is to receive!
I feel my personal struggle this
year has been forgiveness. Grudges are never something I have ever enjoyed
feeling towards others, a situation, or myself. I try to play the blame game or
“figure it out” just so I don’t have to feel angry. But this year I have
learned to hold myself accountable for my mistakes. It took me a long time to
forgive myself. Actually, it did not hit me till this summer when people I had
never met accepted me for who I was not judging me on my obvious mistake. But
then I think maybe I forgave myself too much if I was willing to experience
this all over again after it about destroyed me the first time.
God does not lead you to any trial
you cannot overcome. This time I feel such peace that He gives me strength. I
am no longer relying on another person for my comfort and strength but on a God
that I know will NEVER let me down. His love for me is unconditional and it
fills my heart with happiness that He is putting me through pain for me to
FINALLY see His light.
Tug, tug, tug. You know when there
is that one thing that you know you should do but just don’t do it. I have been
living like that the past 4 years. Coming into college I knew faith was
important to me, but how important was it if getting drunk and making out with
boys was my lifestyle. God knows I am worth so much more than that; it is time
I start believing it too.
I will never be perfect and I know
God does not expect perfection from me. I do believe that He wants to change my
heart but have me stay the same. I have gifts that He has given me that I want
to continue to use in my life. Some of these gifts I see in myself include;
bringing people together, giving straightforward advice, being a giver and
showing unconditional love to those that deserve it the least. I just feel like
God wants to use me in His plan for someone else’s life. I hope that I can grow
and learn and be able to share my story.
So today, January 8th,
2014, I ask you God to accept me. Hold my hand through the good and the bad.
Guide me. Make me into the daughter that You have always known I would be. I’m
sorry it has taken me so long to love you with my whole heart. I am here and I
am ready. I know that You can handle me and that You want to always love me.
Thank you for forgiving me of my mistakes, sins, and bad habits. I know I have
not been living my life in a Godly way and my tears show both You and I that
acknowledgement. You make my heart happy! I am excited I really am. Just with
any new relationship there is so much to know about you! If you have any
questions about me, please just ask.
I feel You. Moments when I feel you
are my favorite moments. I can feel Your hand on me. I feel it right now as I’m
writing this. A tear is rolling down my cheek, but unlike most times when I
have cried this past year this time it is for good. There is so much good in
Your grace and salvation. I am beyond lucky to have such a loving Father.
Hold me and help me all the days of
my life. I love you God. I trust you with my whole heart.
Today and every day. Forever and
Always.
Love,
Brittany Berneitta Nelson
“The Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord will give grace
and glory; no good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly.” Psalm
84:11
This is my favorite Bible verse. I know that You will never
withhold any good thing from my life. Thank you.
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